(no subject)

[podling]

I actually had 2 posts all thought out and such, but that will have to wait. For now, ponder this... I am afraid of whales.

Not afraid as in I'd never go on a whale watch or to Sea World or anything, just kind of freaked out by their simply ginormous size.

Someone else's journal (I forget whose) said something about what animal they were afraid of, and they said none. And I thought, "am i?" And the immediate thought was, "WHALES!!!" (followed closely by "SHARKS!!!", but I digress) Then I was thinking, "Why whales?" I mean, it's extremely unlikely that death by whale is waiting for me. Whales aren't somewhere lying (floating) in wait for the moment I come by. Whales do not actually have it in for me. And from what I hear, whales aren't really fond of people as food. However... they're huge. Their hugeness is intimidating. They could smoosh me and not even notice. It's unlikely I'd be somewhere in the path of smooshness, but at the same time, they *could* without any kind of attention paid whatsoever. And so I examined the roots of this, and came up with two instances. One is having seen on tv (back when I had tv) an orca accidentally killing one of their human co-performers at some Sea World-ish place. The other, and probably the more freaky experience, was seeing the big blue whale at the Museum of Natural History. Gi-nor-mous.

Comments

[tygerseye.livejournal.com]

Uhh...

This might fall into the category of the uber-paranoid ;-)

LOL

[podling]

Oh yeah! Well, one day, I'll come over and throw a little stuffed whale at you! Wait, that probably wouldn't scare you... Uh... well. Um, yeah. Whale!!!

[tygerseye.livejournal.com]

*pets stuffed whale*

*sticks tongue out*

;-)

[podling]

I'm sure it'd be a cute stuffed whale, if that's any consolation. Hee.

[piratejenny.livejournal.com]

Not really. I mean, she does kayak on the ocean. She could easily get swamped!

[tygerseye.livejournal.com]

... by a whale?

LOL

[podling]

Hmmn. You may have a point. It does seem unlikely.

Especially given my lack of going out deep enough... ;)

[tygerseye.livejournal.com]

*snerk*

[piratejenny.livejournal.com]

By the water a whale would send spewing when it smacks its tail on the ocean!

[kendwoods.livejournal.com]

Orcas are actually dolphins I believe. So add fear of mean ole dolphins to the list. :-p

Always willing to feed someone's neuroses,

Ken

[podling]

It was really the size of the tail on the one at the Museum that did it for me, I think. I mean, you perform with an orca, you get squished... it's a job hazard. Like fire and firefighters.

But they're still really heavy. So I think it might be more a size and weight issue. And you don't see small whales. I mean, I'm sure I'd be afraid of a plane or a train landing on me too. Actually, I used to think a plane would land on me one day. I've gotten past that though. ;)

[tanaise.livejournal.com]

nope, they're whales.

http://yahooligans.yahoo.com/content/animals/species/4018.html

But if you get on their good side, you can use them to protect you from blue whales. For whatever definition of 'useful' that might be.

[dangerdean.livejournal.com]

For that matter, dolphins are also whales...of a sort, and they're certainly not scary. Unless they're vampire dolphins.

[piratejenny.livejournal.com]

Oh, I don't know. Dolphins can be mean. They attack each other for no reason, kill their young...

Hey, they're kinda like us!

[godcat.livejournal.com]

Pretty interesting stuff; similarly I'm bug-phobic because they are so /small/.

[podling]

That's understandable, actually. I mean, I've heard ew-worthy things about burrowing bugs, man. Little bastards!

[piratejenny.livejournal.com]

So, back when the bar under the whale was open (might be again, I don't remember), did you ever get drunk and THEN look at the whale? It's super intimidating!

You do know they put the whale back last year, right? The whole display just seemed wrong without it.

And I think the only death by whale you need to worry about is if someone decides to dispose of a dead whale by blowing it up with dynamite.

[tanaise.livejournal.com]

Wait, I think I've found a way to combine death by whale with her fear of a plane landing on her. Hitchhiker's guide to the universe!

[toratigris.livejournal.com]

Ooo, did you read about the exploding whale in Japan earlier this year? That one didn't even require dynamite. Apparently as it decomposed, gases built up, and finally, kablooie! Passersby were splattered with decomposing whale goo.

So maybe podling should only be afraid of dead whales, really...

[piratejenny.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I did. I thought it was an exceptionally amusing story.

[vgnwtch.livejournal.com]

You sure you're not just afraid of Wales?

[tanaise.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I was thinking it's probably Prince Charles who scares her.

[straif.livejournal.com]

Mae ofn morfil ar Podling. Oes ofn Cymru ar Podling?

Mae ofn banciwr arna'i.

[podling]

That is scary as well. Less likely to smoosh me though. Well, actually, I'm not sure how the probabilities work out, but still...

[sidruid.livejournal.com]

Fluke.

[sidruid.livejournal.com]

And in related news,
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/3916249.stm
the key to survivng a whale attack is to shout really loud, at a really low frequency.

[podling]

Fluke!!!

I can kind of get it...

[crowyhead.livejournal.com]

I mean, I'm not really afraid of whales, but I do get a sort of vertiginous feeling when I look at the whale at the museum or see something on TV that confirms how huge they are. It's something akin to that tenseness I get in the back of my legs when I look off of a high building. Things just aren't supposed to be that big, unless they're dinosaurs and extinct.

Re: I can kind of get it...

[podling]

And have no substance other than bones. Honestly, the whale at the museum that's fully fleshed out is just scary!!!

[straif.livejournal.com]

Call me Ishmael.

Yes, I know I'm a freak

[packardgoose.livejournal.com]

When a friend of mine went diving off the coast of Fiji in college, he was given a large inflatable plastic rescue beacon. The beacon, essentially a small pink float with a 6ft pink spire, had a bad reputation among the experienced divers. On several occasions a diver signaling for rescue with one had been killed by a whale. Apparently, whales mistook the 6ft pink spire for a whale-penis and attempted to mate with the unwitting diver. Unfortunately for the diver, whale mating takes the course of the female lunging out of the water and onto the other whale, or in this case, diver. Consequently, most of the dive party was hesitant to use the beacons.

Re: Yes, I know I'm a freak

[podling]

You obviously should read that book 'Fluke'. Really you should. I'd offer to lend it, but sidruid lent it to me and I gave it back already. Though it's pretty cheap in trade paperback now. It's by Christopher Moore. Go!!!

[straif.livejournal.com]

bexspex just pointed out that groups of whales are pods...

You should probably learn some basic phrases in Whale:
PLEEEAASE DOOOOON'T SMMMOOOOOOOSSSSSHHH MEEEEE.
IIIII AAAAMMMMMM NNOOOTTTTTT FFFOOOOODDDD.

[podling]

It's collateral damage man... it's not like all whales want to eat me.