(no subject)
Dec. 11th, 2004 07:32 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
podlingOkay, so I watched Before Sunset again today. I love this movie, I seriously do. Loved it even more the second time. I mean, I wanted to see it when first I heard of it, and I liked Before Sunrise but… I don’t know, I didn’t expect to really love it. Something about it just strikes me. Went out and got it the day it came out on DVD, and oh my. It speaks to me. Much of it is things I have/would say in my own life. And I recognize the striving… the wanting of intimacy maybe? I don’t know. I could express it, but it’s easier in person. The odd thing is that I know no one else who’s seen it. I know what, one person on LJ who has. And I want to talk about it!
Anyway, it made me think, as it did last time, and probably will each time I watch it. Thinking about what I actually want out of relationships, out of love, out of life. It’s like I know what pieces are good, but the puzzle is incomplete. It’s easier to say what you don’t want. I don’t want to be marginalized, I don’t want it to be an inherently unequal thing where one person is so into it and happy, and the other just… isn’t. I don’t want what my parents have, just no. But if that is the major basis for my own relationships, am I going to end up going that way anyway? I want connection, is that so much to ask? But maybe it is, maybe I only imagine that it can be there, that there can be deep connections that way. Maybe movies and books and such make it seem like it’s possible. But does anyone ever consider what happens after the end? Perhaps I’m just pessimistic, but it seems that a lot of romantic comedies fuel the romance with conflict, then poof! Everything is good. Everyone is happy. So what? The conflict goes away? The people are changed? People change constantly in some ways, but not in others. (Incidentally, Before Sunset was not like that, everyone should watch it, truly)
So I sit here after watching this movie, thinking various thoughts... Can/do people have that kind of connection in real life? I take it for granted that they do, but will I ever? Mysteries of life, I suppose.
Anyway, it made me think, as it did last time, and probably will each time I watch it. Thinking about what I actually want out of relationships, out of love, out of life. It’s like I know what pieces are good, but the puzzle is incomplete. It’s easier to say what you don’t want. I don’t want to be marginalized, I don’t want it to be an inherently unequal thing where one person is so into it and happy, and the other just… isn’t. I don’t want what my parents have, just no. But if that is the major basis for my own relationships, am I going to end up going that way anyway? I want connection, is that so much to ask? But maybe it is, maybe I only imagine that it can be there, that there can be deep connections that way. Maybe movies and books and such make it seem like it’s possible. But does anyone ever consider what happens after the end? Perhaps I’m just pessimistic, but it seems that a lot of romantic comedies fuel the romance with conflict, then poof! Everything is good. Everyone is happy. So what? The conflict goes away? The people are changed? People change constantly in some ways, but not in others. (Incidentally, Before Sunset was not like that, everyone should watch it, truly)
So I sit here after watching this movie, thinking various thoughts... Can/do people have that kind of connection in real life? I take it for granted that they do, but will I ever? Mysteries of life, I suppose.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2004-12-12 09:13 pm (UTC)I think intimacy is one of those double-edged swords. We all want it, but at the same time it scares us, a lot. I mean, it's really quite a vulnerable state to be in.